If you think your personal stories aren’t professional enough for a ceremony, let me stop you right there. This idea that “professional” means you must be a blank canvas with no visible life of your own is one of the quickest ways to drain the heart out of your work.
A lot of new celebrants say to me, “I’m terrified I’ll overshare,” or, “What if I make it about me?” So they swing completely the other way. They strip everything personal out, they cling to safe, generic phrases, and they end up sounding like a very polite robot with a nice folder. The family gets a tidy ceremony… but not a deeply felt one.
The reality is, people don’t invite a walking script to lead their most important moments. They invite a human being. And authentic connection doesn’t come from pretending you don’t have a life, or a past, or feelings of your own. It comes from being able to weave tiny threads of your experience into the fabric of their story, in a way that supports them rather than eclipses them.
That might be something as simple as saying, “When I spoke with your mum, she reminded me of my own grandmother in the way she…” and then using that to highlight a quality the family already recognises. Or at a wedding, briefly acknowledging, “I’ve stood in this spot many times, and every single time I’m reminded how much courage it takes to stand up here and promise your life to someone.” You’re not turning it into your autobiography – you’re using your lived experience to deepen the moment.
The skill is in how you use those stories. You choose details that echo the couple or the family, you keep it brief, and you always bring it back to them. When you learn to do that deliberately, your ceremonies land differently. People come up to you afterwards and say, “You really got us,” not because you stayed invisible, but because you were willing to be a real person in the room.
So no, your personal stories aren’t “unprofessional” by default. Used thoughtfully, they’re one of the most powerful tools you have. They make you memorable, they build trust, and they turn a well-written script into a ceremony people actually feel.
If you're ready to explore how your unique story strengthens your celebrant voice, comment 'VOICE'.
